Anton Oliver admitted his commitment to rugby was wavering after helping Oxford University defeat Cambridge University in a Varsity Match thriller at Twickenham.
But the former New Zealand hooker still could not bring himself to call time completely on his illustrious career.
"I am not sure," the 33-year-old said when asked if he had played his last game following Oxford's 33-29 win here Thursday.
"I'm in limbo," added Highlanders hero Oliver, who is currently on a one-year course at Oxford where he is studying for an MSc degree in bio-diversity, conservation and management.
"My mind and passion is starting to be relocated elsewhere but, who knows, we'll just wait and see." Oliver played the last of his 59 Tests for New Zealand during last year's shock World Cup quarter-final loss to France in Cardiff.
Like a number of All Blacks he was lured to Europe after the World Cup, joining French club side Toulon.
But despite being offered a contract worth some 250,000 euros to stay with Toulon, a frustrated Oliver left with fierce criticism about the standard of play and the level of aggression in the French Second Division.
However he has rediscovered a sense of joie de vivre at Oxford and was delighted to have played his part in the highest scoring Varsity match in the 127 editions of a fixture dating back to 1872.
The 'Dark Blues' inspired by three tries before the break from 21-year-old English wing Tim Catling - the first Varsity hat-trick in 74 years and the first ever by an Oxford player at Twickenham - were 18 points ahead early in the second-half.
However 'Light Blues' Cambridge, bolstered by former Australia second-row Dan Vickerman, fought back and at the close were pushing for a try which would have given them a fourth successive Varsity victory, although their hopes, in part, foundered on an Oxford scrum with Oliver at its heart.
"It must have been great to watch," said Oliver. "I thought Cambridge showed tremendous fortitude to come back. It was 33-15 and I thought they were pretty shot. But they came back, played with good structure and put us under pressure."
Oliver paid tribute to the influence former England coach Brian Ashton, who acted as a consultant to Oxford, had had on his team.
"I gather, listening to anecdotes about this game, players tend to freeze because they are not professional athletes.
"Cats just cruises along," said Oliver. "He's a lovely guy. A really good team man - and fast."
Former New Zealand captain Oliver, whose father, Frank, also played for the All Blacks, has experienced more than most what rugby union has to offer.
However he was adamant the Varsity Match still had a special place in the 21st Century game.
"The international players come here and we don't really know the history. For some of our guys and some of the Cambridge lads it's the biggest game of their career.
"It's unique. All the traditions involved, the wonderful players and people who've come before me in this jersey. It's problematic comparing it to Test match rugby in terms of size and skill and what have you but, in its own way, it's utterly unique.
"It's just been a wonderful experience to play in. I am sure Dan Vickerman would say the same and he's played a lot of top-class rugby.
"The boys emptied the tanks, both sides, and I think the crowd got their money's worth." But worryingly for Varsity chiefs, a match that within the last decade attracted attendances of more than 60,000 was witnessed Thursday by a crowd of under 30,000.
"We need a bit more than that but that was a flagship for amateur rugby," said a proud Oliver.
Sapa-AFP Rugbyweek.com
